Life-Changing Conversations with Toph: The East and West Epilogue
by naggeluide
Summary: The dinner party we've all been waiting for. In which I close out what was a canon-compliant story by sticking rainbow flags all over it.


**Life-changing Conversations with Toph: the East and West Epilogue**

* * *

**A/N:** While it's not strictly necessary that you read East and West in order to understand this, it is highly recommended.

* * *

"Concrete. Yes, I've heard it's very … hard."

Iroh looked over to where his nephew was doing his best to engage in polite conversation with Captain Ming Dae's oldest daughter Peng. Zuko kept glancing towards the door of the Jasmine Dragon, which meant that at least he wasn't thinking of bolting. If he was, he'd be eyeing up the windows instead. Iroh sighed; it was probably too much to hope that Zuko would ever find a young lady with whom conversation flowed easily, but call him an optimist in his old age.

"The applications for sustainable low-income housing are truly inspiring," the young lady continued. "Having a material that's basically earth in liquid form almost completely negates the need for earthbenders in construction crews!"

"Soooo, would that technically be earth- or water-bending? Did I ever tell you about that time Katara and I did sludge-bending?" Iroh's self-adopted niece and self-proclaimed (and also rarely argued against) greatest earthbender in the world could be trusted to insert herself into any and all conversations involving rocks. At least, Iroh thought, bending was a safe topic of conversation for Zuko, too. With any luck, Zuko could avoid any major small talk blunders until Peng was sufficiently blinded by his physical attractiveness.

"It was back during Zuko's baby sister's first attempt to conquer the city…" Well. So much for that hope. Iroh would have to try again next week, with a different young lady, apparently. He briefly pondered the idea of disowning Toph completely, but he was yet to discern the motivation behind her repeated sabotage of all of Iroh's best matchmaking setups for his nephew. In theory, she should be supportive - she hated Zuko's pining-over-Mai face as much as Iroh did. But she also loved being the center of attention, so perhaps that was why she did it.

Fortunately for everyone involved, Zuko had developed some skill at escaping from his ministers and he applied the same technique here, excusing himself to greet a young man who had just stepped in through the door. Perhaps not just an excuse, Iroh thought as he idly observed out of the corner of his eye while readying a teapot. Was Zuko … smiling?

Iroh vaguely recognized the young man from the Earth King's palace. Barely shorter than his nephew but somewhat broader, with a softness around the edges and skin a shade or two paler than that of the Ming family that spoke of an indoor job - could this be one of the Earth King's staffers? If so, he was out of uniform like everyone else in the shop tonight, wearing a long vest over a narrow-sleeved shirt in a style not unlike Zuko's own, only in Earth greens instead of Fire reds. Zuko stubbornly kept his preference for the boyish cut that left his forearms bare, complaining about the ease with which tea or ink stains or scorch marks took up residence on long sleeves.

It wasn't until the young man laughed with his whole body that Iroh remembered Zuko telling Iroh about the guest he'd invited with the intention of introducing to Toph, and Iroh made his way over to greet the pair, leaving the tea to steep.

"Uncle Iroh, this is Kabu! He's a court stenographer, I don't know if you've met before."

"I have seen you around the palace once or twice, sir, though I'm sure you don't remember me -" Kabu stammered a bit, despite himself, clearly nervous in front of Iroh.

"That's certainly to be blamed on my advanced age rather than the impression left by your presence!" Iroh chuckled, doing his best to put the young man at ease. Toph was even on her best days an intimidating person, so Kabu would need a bit more confidence than he was currently displaying to keep up with her. Zuko was doing his best to offer encouragement, too, letting his rare easy and happy smile come out to shine.

"Here, I want you to meet a friend of mine, Toph. Well, maybe she's more like my evil little sister. Except more evil than my actual evil little sister, ha. What am I saying, neither of them are evil…" Zuko tugged Kabu away before Iroh even had a chance to ask his preference in tea. Iroh shook his head, admiring his nephew's dedication but still amazed at his ability to be simultaneously very helpful and not helpful at all.

Iroh stopped to confirm with Captain and Mrs. Ming that they would like the house blend, and paused by the doorway to finish his mental list. Misaki, the Fire Lord's aide-de-camp, should be arriving soon, and she took mint during work hours but oolong when she was off - ah, speak of the angel, here she was now.

With a very familiar bounty hunter in tow. By the hand.

"Good evening, Iroh," she greeted in her usual pleasant, no-nonsense tone. "I believe you already know my girlfriend, June?"

* * *

Misaki. Was an evil genius, and June loved her for it, even if she couldn't convince her that she was, in fact, actually working for the bad guys. Fire Nation armor had skulls on it, for Oma's sake, June had argued, only to find that the military was officially phasing those out starting the next day. Well. At least the 'genius' fact was indisputable.

As was the look of polite shock on June's least-favorite customer's face.

"Old dragon," she greeted, baring her own fangs in a dare for him to say anything about her and Misaki.

Confronted with two powerful women, the Dragon of the West wisely kept his comments to himself.

"What do you take for tea? I'm afraid we're all out of sake," he said instead, playing up the innocent old man act again with a slow blink.

June could and would passive-aggressively criticize lifestyle choices, too. A warm touch on her arm stayed her just as she was about to bite out a scathing reply.

"Since we clearly have similar preferences," Misaki started smoothly, and June leaned smugly into her side. "What about oolong?"

"I'll have that for you right away," Iroh said, stepping away.

"I'll have _that_ right away," June growled low to her lover, not-so-subtly cupping her ass. The sound of a teapot slipping from old hands and shattering on the floor was music to June's ears.

"Patience, dear. At the very least, let's have dinner first," replied Misaki coolly.

Evil genius, indeed.

* * *

"Hey, Toph!"

Toph didn't bother turning in the direction of Zuko's voice, as was normally considered polite by sighted people, because she knew he didn't care. He was, however, followed by slightly erratic footsteps, suggesting that that someone was being dragged along by the uncharacteristically excited firebender. Now _that_ was worth facing them for. Curious, Toph concentrated her senses through the marble floor in front of her.

"You really need to meet Toph," Zuko was saying to the person beside him. "Toph is awesome, hey, Toph this is Kabu! He has the best expressions, you should've seen -"

Wow, this was _really_ interesting, Zuko wasn't one to fall into the _have you seen_ trap often, and he was even less so one to practically gush about … anyone or anything except honor, ever. His heart rate was slightly elevated, and were his cheeks flushed from alcohol? Sparky normally didn't drink, and if Uncle was slipping booze into his tea he'd really gotten desperate in these semi-frequent get-Zuko-laid get-togethers. What was going on?

Toph gave Zuko a funny look and interrupted some boring political story he was telling, which he seemed to find both completely enthralling and a prime example of Kabu's many exemplary qualities. "Hey Sunshine, wanna help me grab tea from the kitchen?"

"Don't you want to talk to Kabu?" he replied, puzzled.

Toph refrained from rolling her eyes, and sighed internally instead. "It would be rude to leave your guest without a drink," she hinted instead.

"Oh," Zuko said, with a small flash of annoyance at himself for having momentarily forgotten social etiquette before turning to his companion. "Okay. Sorry about that. What kind of tea do you like? You look like a ginger kind of guy."

"I'll take whatever you suggest as long as it's hot," Kabu replied in an even tone, and Toph had to struggle very hard to keep an evil grin from spreading victoriously across her face. This was getting good. Really, really good. "Surprise me," Kabu finished, and Toph was glad she wasn't drinking anything because she would have spit it all over both of them at that moment, feeling Zuko's heartrate spike at that, despite the fact that he was still heedless of how he was being flirted with.

"We'll be right back. Don't go anywhere," said her perfectly oblivious, yet clearly very happy friend, and Toph herded Zuko into the kitchen before he accidentally lit something on fire.

"So," she started, once they were out of earshot. "You invited a cute guy to dinner."

"Toph, he's great!" exclaimed Zuko, not bothering to contradict her, so at least Toph knew that Kabu was, indeed, cute. "You're really going to like him. He works in the palace, as a stenographer which probably isn't that exciting to you, but what _is_ amazing are his expressions. I mean, I could watch him react to the trade commission's nonsense all day, they're that good, but it's not all facial which I know you can't pick up so well, it's like … his whole body, and -"

Toph did not need to hear about Zuko's date's whole body, and interrupted. "You invited a cute guy to dinner, because you thought I would like him."

"Yes?" The puzzled tone indicated that Zuko was at his maximum state of oblivious this evening.

"Did you tell him that?" Toph coaxed. "With your words?"

"No," said Zuko. "There wasn't time." Toph counted five before the realization caught up to him. "Wait. Oh, no. What did I - I'm not gay!"

Toph gave her best grin, proud that he'd finally realized what was happening. "But I am, Zuko. So just trust me when it comes to this."

"I didn't know that," Zuko replied slowly. Toph cut him a bit of slack, because he was probably having a lot of revelations at once right now.

"It's okay," she said casually. "I'm seventeen. It's hard to know things at my age, but I'm pretty sure about this one."

"_Are_ you okay?" Zuko asked, totally focused on her now as he attempted an affectionate punch, which she dodged. Beating people up with love was _her_ thing, thank you very much.

"I haven't talked to my parents about it yet, but in the meantime at least I'm not in danger of getting knocked up," Toph answered frankly. Zuko made some kind of weird noise as his brain short circuited, so Toph continued. "When I do tell them, make sure you're around for a therapy sparring sesh, yeah? Also because they freak out whenever the Fire Lord comes over, and me liking women probably isn't as awful to them compared to the possibility of me liking you." Actually, that might be a very good idea indeed. Toph warmed to the topic. "I'll be all, 'meet my new boyfriend, the Fire Lord' and Mom will probably faint after she calculates the dowry numbers, so then I'll be like 'Psyche! I'm a lesbian' and all will be accepted without a hitch!"

Zuko's language processing center was back online, and Toph felt him nod. "That's what friends are for I guess?" he offered.

Toph punched him and steered the topic back to their original problem. "Anyway. Your _date_ is waiting for _you_. Not _me_. And may I just say, Fire Lord Oblivious, by some miracle it seems you are doing something right. He digs you."

"I'm going to die of awkwardness." Zuko's voice was muffled in his hands.

Toph snorted. "If that could kill, you'd've been dead a long time ago."

"So you think he's really into guys?" Zuko asked, with less hand in the way this time, meaning he was probably doing something adorable like peeking out through his own fingers.

Toph chuckled. "World's greatest earthbender also means world's most reliable gaydar," she quipped. "Speaking of which, you might be more gay than you think."

Oh, and Toph straight up felt that blush, minimal bending required. "I'll admit it's not something I've ever given much thought to," Zuko stammered out. "Since I've always known I'd have to … well…"

"Make little Fire princes and princesses one day?"

"Yeah. That. And I never really knew any guys my own age, at least until Sokka, so it wasn't like I ever got the chance to find out, and then I was Fire Lord?"

Toph had been nice enough for one evening, and this was something she'd always wondered about. "So you had a crush on Sokka too, huh?"

"WHAT?!" Zuko yelped, then groaned. The hands were back. "Oh Agni … things make so much sense now."

Toph threw her head back and _cackled_. "Go enjoy your date, and pondering your bisexual awakening," she said when she came up for air. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

"Uhhh… okay." Zuko still sounded a little dazed, but soon snapped out of it. "Wait, what's that supposed to mean?"

In response, Toph just shoved him in the direction of the main room and into a bounty hunter, realizing belatedly that no one had gotten anyone tea in the end.

"Life-changing conversations with Toph," she muttered to herself, trying out the feel of the words on her tongue, and liking them. "Happens every day. Don't see why people make a big deal about these things."

* * *

Zuko didn't know what felt more out-of-place, talking to June in his uncle's tea shop, or talking to a bounty hunter about his aide-de-camp and right-hand woman, without whom the Fire Nation (and doubtless, Zuko himself) would surely spiral into an agonizing pit of hopeless despair.

"So, uh. You and Misaki."

"You wanna try and make anything of it kid?" June's posture was relaxed and all the more dangerous for it as she raised a dark eyebrow.

"What? No! I'm just - it's just - Misaki … she's a national treasure," Zuko exclaimed defensively. "Well, I'm sure you know that. If anything happened to her - "

"Kid, don't start. First of all, the 'hunt you down and make you pay' is kind of my job, except that I make other people pay, and secondly, she may be your national treasure but she's my personal treasure."

… Right. Had Zuko sounded too possessive there? "Oh. Good. That's good. I just don't know what I would do without her."

Not that that had come out any better.

"You and me both, kid." June's tone was surprisingly soft for someone who hunted people down for money.

"Professionally, I mean!" Zuko struggled to clarify by throwing more words at the problem. People were always telling him to use his words. "Personally, well, not interested? As more than a friend. Or a terrifying aunt figure. What I mean is -"

"Oma and Shu you're hard to listen to," June drawled, pushing off of the wall she was leaning on. In the past she might have successfully loomed over him, but now he'd grown to have the height advantage. "Good thing you've got someone else to write your speeches. So, that cute boy over there your date?"

"Uh, yeah," Zuko blurted, June's non-looming having accomplished its goal regardless. "Accidentally. But a good accident, so far. I didn't know … that I … until, well, I was talking to a friend just now and she … helped me realize some things."

"You're lucky to have a friend like that," June replied, conversationally, which was new. "It's a tough thing to go through but, well, seems to me you've gotten through some pretty tough things in your life already. At least this experience might lead to some fun sexy times." She winked, and Zuko resisted the urge to bury his face in his hands. Fire Lords weren't supposed to get embarrassed like that, were they?

"I'm just going to leave now, I realized I'm bisexual ten minutes ago and I'm not ready for that." Zuko supposed that that had come out better than it could have been expected to. Oh _fuck_, had he just come out too? To _June_ of all people? Before even Uncle? That was just all sorts of wrong.

As Zuko left to find Uncle, he could have sworn he heard June mutter at his back: "I knew that from day one, kiddo."

* * *

There was definitely a more optimal configuration in which to accommodate the two conversations that were underway, Peng knew. However, she also knew it would be impolite to suggest, and her parents had given her quite the lecture about politeness and best behaviors and high society before they'd left this evening.

Still. Peng's opinion of high society was significantly lower now, because these royals couldn't even get the damned seating arrangement right.

Peng was currently seated between the Fire Lord - Zuko, as he had insisted - and Kabu, who were having a conversation either over her head or in front or behind her as awkward leaning allowed, and she herself was trying to talk to Toph, who was to Kabu's left.

Even though eye contact was not required on Peng's end of the discussion, given the unsighted nature of its other member, she felt rude to not try to offer it. Another manners conundrum. She'd rather hoped they could focus on the problem at hand, which was debating how best to design low-cost, sustainable housing given the spatial constraints of the Lower Ring. "Ideally, we could build up," Peng was arguing, as Kabu's voice, headed the other direction, said: "I only reached majority half a year ago so this is my first job as an adult."

"Unfortunately, concrete of even the highest quality is simply not suitable for high-rise structures," Peng continued.

"I really want to work for the newspapers one day, you see, I do sketches…" That was Kabu, talking past her.

A choking sound came from Peng's right, even though Zuko wasn't eating anything at the moment. She heard a muttered "Agni, you're perfect" disrupt her reception of Toph's reply to her statement.

"Sorry, can you say that again, Toph?" Peng tried, but was overlapped by Zuko asking Kabu if he happened to draw people.

Apparently Toph had excellent hearing, though, which could partially compensate for the fact that she was almost completely blind, sitting on a wooden chair where her toes barely brushed the floor. "Do you think metal reinforcement could help?" Toph called over Kabu's positive response. "Not sheets, but maybe … a type of internal scaffolding framework. Maybe like cables, but solid."

That was a promising avenue of thought, but the boys were giggling now about the facial expressions of some politicians or other which was quite distracting. Some people were trying to brainstorm over here, for the good of the world, could they just maybe tone it down a notch?

"Oma and Shu, _yes_, I would _absolutely_ sketch Cho and Lang," Kabu was saying. "See, the drawing I do isn't like for portraits, it's called caricature…"

"At least construction crews are more used to working with metal without employing bending," Peng tried to contribute to her own ongoing conversation, even though she was sure that there was a better idea forming in her mind right now, if only she had the mental space to think it through. Whoever had come up with the rules of politeness had clearly not cared at all about progress.

Fortunately, Toph didn't have the same restraints on rudeness as the rest of them, and even she was fed up with the cross-talk now. "Shut UP, theater nerds! Hey Kabu, can you and Peng switch places?"

"Gladly," responded the cheerful stenographer, standing up and politely pulling Peng's chair out of the way as she did the same.

"That's not theater, it's art," Zuko attempted to correct Toph.

"More like satire, actually," Kabu added amicably, before focusing his attention on the Fire Lord. "Wait, you're into theater?"

"Just keep it off our buildings," Toph grumbled as Peng slid into the seat at her side.

"Actually, studies have shown that public art or even brightly painted buildings can have a positive effect on developing communities," Peng commented. "But back to the building aspect…"

Toph propped her head up on her hand and turned fully in Peng's direction now. "Yes, do tell me more."

Finally. A seating arrangement that made _sense_.

* * *

Zuko, knowing himself, had probably gone and made things awkward again. Dinner had been great, apart from the stilted conversation coming from the older adults' side of the table, which given Uncle's congeniality was a little unusual. Uncle had also kept looking at him and Toph oddly, but maybe he was just wondering why the young people had shuffled places mid-meal. Maybe Zuko should apologize for that later, although he was very unapologetic about the results. He'd quite enjoyed getting to know Kabu better, and the stenographer really was easy to communicate with, due in part to the way his whole posture was capable of emoting.

But now he'd probably made it weird, because everyone else was inside having an aperitif but Zuko didn't drink anymore due to both Sokka and assassination attempts, and maybe Kabu had wanted to even though he hadn't objected to stepping outside with him. And Zuko still hadn't said anything, because out here the semi-darkness on the steps by the service entrance doorway made Kabu's green eyes dark like the forest, and it was too much to ask of his coordination to look at them and talk at the same time.

"Thanks for inviting me," Kabu broke the silence with a quiet voice. "I really don't know what I could have done to earn your attention."

Zuko blinked. "To be completely honest, I didn't realize at the time that I'd … asked you out," he admitted, hastily choking out the last phrase. "But I don't regret it! And don't think for a second that you're not worth my attention!" he was quick to add, because it would just be wrong otherwise. "I'm enjoying that you're here, you're easy to talk to and so _creative_ and doing really amazing work."

"Ok but," Kabu didn't seem quite convinced yet, as evidenced from the way he held himself. "Compared to you. No contest."

Zuko looked away, not sure he wanted to see Kabu's response to his next question. "Are you just saying that because I'm the Fire Lord?"

Kabu's bright laugh was muted, but no less genuine. "Honestly, I prefer you without the seven layers of robes."

"It's only four layers actually," Zuko replied automatically.

"Oh, _Spirits_. I didn't mean to say it like that," Kabu instantly corrected, and oh, now Zuko could see what the subtraction of those numbers implied, and blood started rushing to his face. "I mean like this," Kabu clarified with an all-encompassing wave at Zuko's off-duty presentation. "Relaxed, and all. Not stressed, or under attack from half the Earth King's council. You're kind and humble and you really think hard about your opinions and how they're formed, which is completely admirable, and well - you're pretty good-looking too." There wasn't the slightest bit of hesitance in Kabu's stance, a fact which amazed Zuko, and only a hint of nervousness but of the good kind, as he warmed to his topic. "In fact, I would definitely say you're hot. Smoking in fact. No, literally. Is that a normal firebender thing, or? Also am I talking too much."

Dark smoke was, in fact, emitting from Zuko's palms. He stared down at them, seeing but uncomprehending. "Sorry," he blurted, looking back up at Kabu, trying to find an explanation. "I'm not used to people saying nice things about me. And meaning them. Especially… attractive people."

Maybe Zuko should have left out that last part even if it was true, Kabu's eyes were almost wide enough to see the whites around his irises now, and there was a hint of fear in them. "Oh Spirits, the smoke is fire now, please don't combust. I would really like to hold your hand right now, but it is on fire."

Oh. Okay. That would explain…

Fire, right. Zuko was an expert firebender and he was not going to let a few compliments from a handsome young man set him off like he was a teenager watching Mai flay a dummy target from twenty paces. He closed his hands into fists, and the flames went out.

Wait, but how could they hold hands like that? This was both problematic and annoying. Zuko let out a breath that was a hybrid of a frustrated sigh and a nervous laugh. "Agni, but you're cute. And fun."

… And that was not what he had meant to say, but at the very least it was true.

"Is that enough for you right now? Because it is for me." Kabu, it was clear, knew what he wanted. Zuko was less certain; he'd spent so much of his life bound by expectations of family and country that he wasn't sure that fun was a thing he was allowed to have, in relationships least of all. And yet … as he'd said to Toph earlier, he'd never gotten a chance to explore this side of himself, and he didn't think he could stand never knowing what it meant to like both men and women. And here he was with a lovely young man who wasn't trying to get anything out of him besides an opportunity to find out if there was something more to the two of them together.

Zuko reached out carefully for the other boy. "Yeah, I think it's exactly what I need right now." He felt the callouses of the scribe's fingers slide across his palm as he settled it against his own, watching as he twined their fingers together.

"Is this okay?" Kabu asked tentatively. "You're not going to set yourself on fire, are you?"

Zuko let out a small laugh and squeezed his hand. "Yes, it's okay. This is in fact very pleasant."

Later, when Kabu leaned over and shyly kissed him, it was very pleasant too. Something Zuko would definitely not be opposed to trying again very soon.

* * *

Kuei was late, and also bad at finding front doors. Both of these things were due largely to his tendency to get lost in books, or to read when walking. Currently he didn't even have a book in hand, and yet he'd somehow managed to miss the main door entirely. Which wouldn't be a problem normally, but the service entrance was currently blocked by two people who were kissing. Oogie.

Kuei knew from countless books and plays that it was all supposed to be very sweet and romantic, but he really hadn't ever been able to see the appeal of kissing. Kuei loved hugs and snuggling with Bosco, and he supposed he would quite enjoy holding hands, and he had at the very least an academic urge to experience romantic love in order to understand why it was such an overarching theme in classical literature, but he drew the line at kissing.

Oh, it looked like one of the people was Zuko. And the other was Kabu. Was it even more oogie now that Kuei knew the people involved? It was certainly more awkward since he knew that he couldn't just walk up to them and say hello, and he was definitely going to have to find the front door now.

"Scrolls! Bosco!" Kuei heard Toph's voice and saw a path of light spill out from an opened doorway. He and Bosco immediately turned towards it, Kuei mentally blessing Toph for the rescue as they went. He supposed he should also be relieved that Toph and Zuko were not, in fact, dating, and that therefore the world had a better chance of spinning on uninterrupted for the foreseeable future.

"You made it!" Toph exclaimed when they arrived at the front steps. "Come on in. Sparky should be around here somewhere…"

Kuei hurried to stop her from sticking her toe into the dirt by the base of the stairs and getting an unwanted figurative eyeful. "Uhhh, yes he is, he's over by the other entrance kissing Kabu."

Much to his relief, Toph kept her feet out of the earth and instead threw up her arms in victory, declaring: "YAS, QUEEN!"

"No, _king_," Kuei replied, pointing to himself with some confusion while ushering Bosco into the teahouse.

"It's an expression," Toph laughed, explaining as she followed them inside. "The queer community re-appropriating a term meant to insult us. I'm happy for Zuko getting his gay on, that's all."

"Oh," Kuei blinked, making a mental note to update the entry for 'queen' in the _Dictionary of the Common Tongue, Earth Kingdom Edition, 27th Revision_. "Bosco is gay," he added, perhaps unnecessarily. "Everyone should have a gay best friend!" Bosco nudged him in the back for that, and Kuei gave the bear an affectionate pat in return.

"That's awesome!" Toph exclaimed, doing her best to wrap Bosco in a bear hug. Bosco, being an actual bear, was somewhat more successful. Kuei looked down at his two gay best friends tussling on the floor, and felt himself enveloped by a warm feeling, like the best kind of hug.

* * *

Sokka was tired, and hungry, and even though he was resigned to the fact that that was just going to be his life for a while because he was twenty and still needed his damn sleep even when he wasn't going out on White Lotus missions all the time, he couldn't help but perk up at the sight of the soft light shining through the windows of the Jasmine Dragon. He immediately headed towards the service entrance, which after all was the fastest way to the food (if there even _was_ any left given he was four hours late), but paused when he saw two backlit figures saying a quiet farewell by the steps. They were completely lost in each other, which was _adorable_, and Sokka felt a grin break out across his face. One that promptly froze as he saw the light catch on the rough ridges of a scar as both people moved in for a kiss.

Well, now _this_ was an interesting development, and Sokka was surprisingly unsure how he felt about it. Zuko had seemingly been hung up on Knives since Sokka could remember, and although Sokka was a little miffed that Zuko had given in to something as mundane as one of Iroh's get-my-nephew-laid dinners, even he could say that it was about time. The only question left was, who was the lucky lady…

There was a rumble of soft voices, and then the shadowed figure stepped away from Zuko and Zuko gave the cutest, un-Fire-Lord-iest wave Sokka had ever seen, which made him die a little inside between fondness for his friend and secondhand sugar overload.

Sokka promptly came back to life and straight into crisis mode when the person strode past him, new infatuation written clear as day across their body language, and he realized that that was no lady.

Instead of falling into default bro-mode which involved heading over to tease Zuko about girls, Sokka sprinted to the front door of the tea shop and burst in, yelling a hello to Uncle before spotting Toph and making a beeline for her. "Toph! Who is Zuko kissing and why do I feel so weird about it? I'm not homophobic, I swear!"

He'd kept his volume fairly low but Toph nevertheless herded him into the back hallway. "Dude," she reassured him. "No worries, you're not homophobic, you're just bisexual."

"Excuse me?" was all that Sokka could stammer out for the moment.

Toph stared in the direction of his face with a knowing smirk, the quirk of her eyebrows daring him to correct her.

He couldn't.

"Damn," Sokka breathed out. "You're right. Fuck. Or not? I don't know."

"Greatest earthbender, greatest gaydar," Toph sing-songed nonchalantly, sounding like a fast-forwarded version of a conversation she'd already had. "You're welcome. Oh, and I guess you still have that crush on Zuko, huh? My bad. I wouldn't have encouraged him so much with Kabu if I'd known."

Sokka would like to go somewhere to die now, please. Except not, because then he'd never figure out what his bisexuality meant to him. "How do you know all this shit anyway?" he wondered aloud to Toph.

"It's been quite an evening," she replied, uncharacteristically dry before perking up. "Also, welcome to the club! I'm gay."

That actually made a whole lot of sense. "Yeah, I think I always knew that," Sokka said slowly. Just like him being bi, which was something he ought to have considered before, especially given that his own girlfriend identified as bisexual.

"So, you still with Suki?" Toph's constant casual inquiries into the state of his love life also made a whole lot of very different sense now.

"Yeah, and back off dude!"

Toph snorted, unoffended, and shot back: "Says the one trying to get into Zuko's pants."

Which was _too soon_, and Sokka said so. "I am _not_, I'm just having a bisexual crisis that happens to have been triggered by the sight of my _former_, emphasis on former, _especially_ if and when Suki asks, crush making out with a cute guy who wasn't me. Oh sweet-and-sour sea prunes, I'm totally bi and I'm going to have to come out now. Does everyone have to know? How did you do it?"

The smugness went out of Toph's posture for an instant. "I haven't yet, at least not to my parents, have you _met_ them? They've barely gotten used to the idea that I'm a kickass earthbender. But maybe I'll introduce you to my parents as my boyfriend and mom will faint when she realizes the dowry will be paid in seal jerky, then be perfectly okay when I'm like, nah, I like girls is all."

Sokka's stomach growled at the mention of seal jerky, and he stomped off in the direction of the kitchen to think about his life and sexuality. "I'm going to go eat my feelings now. And think about coming out of the closet later."

* * *

The closet door flew open with far more force than Misaki had anticipated, but that was June for you.

"Ugh," proclaimed the bounty hunter as she tugged her on shirt to get it properly aligned on her shoulders once more. "I thought he was never going to leave. Clearly not ready for our level yet. Oh, hi, Toph."

Misaki vaguely recalled that they hadn't heard the young earthbender's footsteps retreat along with the boy's, but chose not to be embarrassed about it. After all, they'd unintentionally overheard what was probably meant to be a private conversation, so this was a fair trade by Earth Kingdom standards.

"Hi June," Toph responded. "I'm two for two on life-changing conversations tonight. Who knew there were so many bisexuals in my best friends club? I did, that's who."

"Well, if they were Earth Kingdom boys I'd blame the repression of their sexuality on the patriarchy, but they're not, so I'm not going to assume." June stated, then immediately contradicted herself. "Fuck the patriarchy. Love who you want."

Misaki quickly caught her partner's hand and gave the scarred knuckles a kiss. Although it could sometimes annoy her, moments like these were when she was proud that June had no filter. "Down with the patriarchy," she agreed, because they still had a long way to go in the Fire Nation too.

"Don't suppose we could do something about that?" Toph inquired, cracking a knuckle meaningfully.

The slow grin spreading across June's face was setting off alarm bells in Misaki's mind. "Oh, no."

That was going to be a lot of work, and even if she already had a folder of ideas specifically for this contingency, Misaki wasn't getting paid for this, and she valued her skills enough to demand compensation for her work. Although some things were worth making an exception for.

The look on June's face could only be described as evil genius. "Oh, _yes_."

* * *

Iroh snuffed out the stove with a motion of his hand and passed the final teapot to Zuko, who added it to his tray before exiting the kitchen, leaving Iroh alone with Toph, who was now yawning widely. Best get her to bed soon, Iroh knew, because even if she was used to sleeping through the sounds of the firebenders' early risings, she would loudly complain about it nonetheless if she hadn't gotten a solid eight hours.

He had a few things to ask her first, however. "Toph," Iroh started, pulling out stools for both of them. "I have had several interesting revelations tonight, that have caused me to start thinking …"

Milky green eyes blinked up at him. "Uncle," she said, aiming her gaze at his face like she only did when deadly serious. "Please don't tell me that you're bisexual too."

Iroh chuckled. "No, I think I'm perhaps a bit too old for that, dear niece. But hopefully not yet too old to change my ways.

I would like to be better able to understand and support people like yourself and my nephew. The way I was raised, and have experienced the world - well, if I continue in that way I'm afraid I might end up unintentionally harming the people I love most with my ignorance."

Toph looked very pleased at his request, all signs of her tiredness instantly disappearing. "Sure Uncle," she said, her genuine smile a far cry from her usual diabolical smirks. "Let's do tea and advice. Only this time I'll give the advice."

She reached for the teapot, then reconsidered. "You can still make the tea, though."

Iroh smiled and took up the familiar motions of brewing as he prepared to listen. "I'd like that very much."

* * *

**A/N:** In this Gay-U, Zuko gets married and adopts Izumi, and Misaki takes over the honorary title of Fire Lady, because let's face it, she's doing the job. Assassination attempts decrease since her partner's a famous bounty hunter, and everyone lives happily ever after. Peng and Kabu invent socially conscious urban street art a la Mexican Muralism and one day when Misaki comes to visit they destroy the patriarchy.

This fic is definitely influenced by _but for the fire-bellied toads_, (on AO3) which is one of my favorites and excellently balances treatment of a serious subject with sweetness, sensitivity and almost crack-level humor in places. So if you want some well-written queer OG Gaang please head over there. Pro tip, you can leave kudos AGAIN if you're not logged in ;)

Also I just realize the whole Misaki/June relationship vaguely echoes Aziraphale/Crowley

Oh, and the reason why Zuko doesn't drink is another story involving the South Pole, his eighteenth birthday, and Midnight Sun madness.


End file.
